Welcome back – it’s good to see you again! [I told you they hadn’t gotten any brighter – pay up, dawg!] Our model this week is Osmar (one syllable,) a recent arrival in the states from New Mexico – which is still in the states, but it’s disturbing how many people don’t know that (mostly Republicans,
Category: Humor
Profiles of Nature 17
Wow, you’re still coming back? We should have defeated even the most die-hard masochists by now, but okay. Today we’re dropping in on Euphrosyne (six syllables,) who’s largely retired from the biz now. She started out just fine, pulling down gigs for Guns and Ammo and Elevator World magazines, and even a walk-on for an episode of BJ and the
Profiles of Nature 16
This week we wave back to Rigoberto, only to realize he was just admiring his ring. Rigoberto didn’t let his appearance hold him back, and Buscemi’d his way into movie roles such as The Jungle Book (1967,) Clash of the Titans (1981,) Conan the Barbarian (1982,) and as a stand-in for Kenneth Copeland and Sylvia Browne (though he regretted both
Profiles of Nature 15
This week we shout out, “Hi!” from a safe distance to Gwendolyn – not because of any fear on her part or ours, but because she has wicked hay fever and this is as close as she’s coming to the outside air during this time of year you’d be the same way if a single pollen grain was damn near the size of your nostril. Gwendolyn is a bikini
Profiles of Nature 14
Our nature photography model this week is Balthazaar, also a drama coach, philosopher, father, and nativity display evaluator, here obviously disappointed at this disorganized mess. Balthazaar has been in the biz for over a decade and is highly sought-after by discerning art directors because of his chiseled features and extensive repertoire of legume trivia, which makes more sense
Dittyday 2: Madness and beyond
It’s time for a little more music – good music, mind you – and this fine Tuesday/Dittyday the selection is a rather largish English band called Madness. Formed in the late ’70s, peaking in the mid ’80s, they’re still performing today, albeit with a lineup that seems to change weekly.
I’m not the person to inform anyone about music styles and all that –
Profiles of Nature 13
This week we meet Prudence: model, fitness instructor, and home gardener (as indicated by the grove on her back.) Prudence is a popular yoga coach with the elderly because she doesn’t include some of the more flexible poses like Ankle Phone and Stuck Stepsister, plus she’s slightly cranky and not all bubbly motivated – we all know the type. She
Profiles of Nature 12
This week, we have Wyatt between shooting sessions, trying to get a makeup artist to confirm that he has nothing stuck in his teeth, forgetting again that he doesn’t have any. Wyatt broke into the biz by jimmying the back door, but then discovered modeling while in prison (it was a pretty bizarre penitentiary.) He has a natural gift for playing teenagers, making him very popular
Profiles of Nature 11
Our first husband/wife team, Hepzibah and Enoch often work together on the same photo shoots, specializing in topics such as housewares and cheating spouses, and have appeared on the covers of cereal boxes and romance novels (and that one notable crossover, the romance-themed cereal called Steamy-Os.) Enoch and Hepzibah initially caught a lot of backlash for their mixed
Profiles of Nature 10
This week we have one of our younger models, Hesterine, here being coached by her handler. Hesterine, naturally, got into the business when pressured by PETA (PETA never asks,) which needed a new spokesmodel after the last one died from malnutrition, curiously since he was on a regular diet of naturally-deceased grass. PETA funded the eye-dewing surgery and the widow’s-peak