{"id":29435,"date":"2021-07-15T08:09:32","date_gmt":"2021-07-15T12:09:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/?p=29435"},"modified":"2021-08-13T12:49:08","modified_gmt":"2021-08-13T16:49:08","slug":"profiles-in-nature-29","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/2021\/07\/profiles-in-nature-29\/","title":{"rendered":"Profiles in Nature 29"},"content":{"rendered":"

Note:
\nRumor has it that the person who usually does these profiles is currently on hour 14 of a 1 hour escape room. He is shouting through the door to the now empty lobby that \u201cI\u2019ve almost got it!\u201d And \u201cNO HINTS!\u201d. That person should be back for the next Profile in Nature. It has fallen to me to perform this task. You\u2019d think that I would know something about nature – or at least have a decent profile, but no – \u201cnature\u201d is that really big room on the other side of my front door, and my head is shaped like a forgotten potato in the back pantry. <\/p>\n

\u201cbird
This is a bird. He is a big bird, (not that Big Bird, but he did audition for the part.) a big, brown bird sitting on a wood thingy, who can\u2019t believe you barged right into the bathroom while he was trying to figure out the bidet. Either that or Martha brought up the whole \u201cWhere is the missing egg?\u201d issue again. How was he supposed to keep track of all three while the game was on? You know what? Martha can go jump off a lake! These are very sharp foot thingys and this hard mouth part can cut through molten steel when angered, so she better just stop bringing that up. This bird has a wingspan, and could fly, but like so many today, they are all waiting longer to get their licenses. It\u2019s a generational thing, who has time for flying anyway? Blame it on social media, everyone else does. He did not realize that flying was even an option until late in life. The problem started with coddling parents (who did okay giving him roots<\/em> but forgot about the other half of that quote), then there was the whole Erica Jong-thing, and finally, as a young adult, he was too embarrassed to attend flight school with the other hatchlings. (By the way, that\u2019s why he initially contact the Children\u2019s Television Network about a role where he could keep his feet on the ground at all times.) Finally, he left the nest and started hanging with the cool birds who knew how to fly, but couldn\u2019t be bothered. That\u2019s where he met Martha. Lately, he starting getting into preening, but he watched a David Attenborough documentary on peacocks, so that idea bit the ghost. The most discouraging revelation, thanks to Martha, was that he didn\u2019t have to be a chicken to be hen-pecked. \u201cWhat? No, we had plenty of Pringles, nobody ate the egg!\u201d He doesn\u2019t have a lot to look forward to, but sometimes, that\u2019s the way the ball crumbles.<\/p>\n

If you join us next week, hopefully the person who usually does this will be back, but if not, you will be introduced to a bug.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Note: Rumor has it that the person who usually does these profiles is currently on hour 14 of a 1 hour escape room. He is shouting through the door to the now empty lobby that \u201cI\u2019ve almost got it!\u201d And \u201cNO HINTS!\u201d. That person should be back for the next Profile in Nature. It has […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,4,3],"tags":[6270],"class_list":["post-29435","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor","category-nature","category-photo","tag-bird"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29435","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=29435"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29435\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=29435"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=29435"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wading-in.net\/walkabout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=29435"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}